If I Ever Leave This World Alive
by CMRR
Summary: An alternate/blended storyline combining elements and characters from both the comics and the show.
1. Chapter 1

The sun beat down, scorching my shoulders. Blistering my face. My only relief came when a breeze would catch the sweat on my neck or brow, seconds of cool bliss that were few and far between. The last of our water wasn't refreshing at all. When I collected it from the stream early that morning it was cold enough, but in the few hours since it had become uselessly warm. The stretch of highway we had been following was quiet. No walkers to speak of. We passed a few that had already been put down, the stench of them making my stomach turn over. We had left our car a few miles back, it was easier to navigate the road on foot. The road was nearly impassible and Chew liked to explore. My only companion, my faithful and beautiful boxer. She didn't miss a thing, picking up on all the little details that I missed. She was excellent at avoiding walkers, and quick to steer us clear of them. Always picking up the scent long before I had a clue, and once she could sense them she would growl quietly, to alert me.

She stopped in her tracks then, sniffing excitedly, and wandered just a bit off the road, stopping at the tree line. She paced about curiously, not anxiously so I chose an SUV and scooted to the top to wait. Chew was a lovable and intelligent dog but also quite fearsome. She saved us both from certain death more times than I care to remember. I whistled to her, real quiet, and she turned to find me. Wagging her tail a bit in response, she ventured into the trees. I tried to get comfortable on my perch, stretching out my legs and pouring a bit of water over my face. Whatever had her attention must have been good. She was never gone more than ten or fifteen minutes. Sometimes, she would try to chase a squirrel or a rabbit for us to eat, but she rarely succeeded. She would pursue them a bit, but she usually lost. After more than twenty minutes, I whistled for her again. A bit louder than usual, looking over my shoulder and all around, waiting to see her emerge. Nothing. I slid off the roof and tried again, listening carefully, even holding my breath, to hear her. My heart started to pound. She never ignored me.

Again, loud. Piercing.

A bark. Just one, reassuring. Too far away. I scanned around once more for movement. I decided to loot the cars in the meantime. Nothing but garbage, and bodies. They all seemed to have been picked over previously. Recently, even. I ventured to the next car, and the next, staying close to the guard rail, my eyes darting back and forth to the woods for Chewie. What I saw next, stopped me in my tracks. Just another car, but there was a small pile of food, some water and a message, written right across the windshield:

SOPHIA STAY HERE WE WILL COME EVERY DAY

My mind raced. No one had seen us for weeks. Anytime we came across people, we hid. Chew didn't trust anyone anymore. Wouldn't let me near anyone we didn't know. And we didn't know anyone.

I whistled again, frustrated that she still hadn't come back. And as if on que, there she was. Except she wasn't was a little girl, partially hidden, too afraid to come out. Chewie wouldn't leave her side, waiting patiently for her and making sure she got my attention as well. I jumped over the rail, dropped my pack beside it and slid down the small hill. Chewie greeted me happily, jumping up and licking at my face, expecting approval. The girl had thrown herself to the ground, trying to make herself disappear into the grass, shaking so hard that I was afraid she might be convulsing.

'Good Lord, you had me scared to death!' I scolded quietly. 'Whatcha got here?' I embraced her, holding her face close to mine and kissing her hard, on the snout. The girl whispered and scooting away, farther into the woods.

'Ya lost?' I called out softly. 'I'm lost too. Won't hurt ya. I promise.'

Nothing. Just the rustling of leaves and quiet crying.

'Must be hungry. Got some food, if ya feel like eating something.'

The rustling stopped.

'Ya like my dog? She's a real good girl, won't let nothin' bad happen to ya.'

She lifted up her face then, her eyes almost swollen shut from crying, dirt streaked down her face. She looked like she was breaking out in hives.

'Come on out, baby. We'll help you.'

Slowly, so slowly, she crept out. Still shaking, still crying. I held out my hand and she flinched violently, falling back and cowering on the ground. Chewie licked her arms, gently and nosed at her.

The little girl sat up, looking over at me. I smiled at her, and Chewie licked her face happily.

'I'm Sonora,' I said quietly. 'This is Chewie.'

'I'm Sophia.' It was so quiet I almost didn't hear it.

'Hi, Sophia.' I held out a hand to her, she flinched again, but shook my hand politely.

'Ya ok?' I asked, looking her over. She was filthy and scratched up, but I didn't see any bites on her. No serious wounds. 'How long ya been out here?'

'I don't know.' She whispered, tears falling from her eyes.

Chewie growled, her head turning sharply to the right. Walkers. I reached for my bow and arrows, which I had set down on the grass beside me. I loaded the bow and shot, once, twice. I retrieved my arrows from their heads, wiping the guts on their clothes as much as possible. Sophia had her arms around Chewie.

'Sophia,' I said gently. 'Let's go back to the road. I think someone will be back for ya soon.' I reached out again, to help her up and she allowed it, though I could feel how weak and nervous she was. I helped her back up to the car and showed her the message. Her eyes went wide and she began to smile a bit.

'I thought they were gone.' She breathed, relief on her face and in her voice.

'Well, we'll wait here with ya. I'm sure your parents will be back soon.'

She smiled again, and began to pay attention to the food that was left for her.

'Must be hungry, baby. Why not try and eat something?'

My own stomach growled at the thought of food. I hadn't been eating much, trying to make our supplies last and making sure Chewie didn't go without. We were down to just a bit of jerky, some protein bars, granola and about half a jar of peanut butter. Chewie loved the jerky with peanut butter on it.

Sophia took a bottle of water, and sipped slowly. Then, when she noticed Chewie watching and panting she poured it out slowly so the dog could lap some up as well. She looked up at me.

'Your dog is nice.' She smiled, patting Chewie on the head. 'You're nice too.'

'I'm sorry ya got lost. Ya must have been real scared.' I leaned against the hood of the car, right next to her.

'I been trying to find my way back here but I kept running into them.'

I knew by 'them' that she meant walkers. Poor kid.

'Done good staying outta their way.' I praised her. 'Sure your folks will be real proud.'

'Just my mama.' Sophia answered.

'Your mama out there alone?'

'No, there's more of us.'

'How many more?' I wanted to do right by the kid but wasn't interested in meeting a bunch of strangers. Me and Chewie were better off alone.

'Mama, and Carl, Carl's mama and daddy, and Dale and Andrea, Shane, Glenn, T-dog, and Daryl.'

Not a lot, but still too many. Chewie would never allow it.

'They good people? Nice to ya, and all that?' I remembered how she flinched and wondered if there was a good reason for it.

'Oh, yes. 'Course they are.' She gave me a funny look and I knew she was being honest. 'My daddy weren't too nice but he's gone now.'

I didn't know what to say. Wasn't about to apologize for her prick of an old man biting it.

'Sure your mama'll come soon.' I assured her, hoping I was doing the right thing and not setting us up for a disaster. I helped her up to roof again so we could watch the road. We sat quietly, and I let her dip her granola bar in my peanut butter. Chewie circled around on the ground, nosing the air, but making no sound.

'How'd ya end up in the woods alone?' I wondered, once I felt she was calmer.

'There was a bunch of them, they came through here and they chased me. Rick was there, he tried to get them. Told me to hide and go back when they were gone..I went the wrong way.'

She looked like she was going to cry again. Seemed ashamed of herself.

'What'd I tell ya, girl? Ya did good. Stayed safe. I'm real proud.' I squeezed her knee, trying to reassure her.

'How did you get lost?' She asked, her eyes following Chewie.

'Well, same as you, I guess.' I smiled, to make her feel better. 'But I got Chewie.'

At her name, she gave a soft bark and I scooted down to give her another drink.

'Who was in your group?'

She was just being friendly, assuming that I had been in a group at all.

'Oh, no one important.' I answered casually, returning to my seat next to her. I opened my pack and pulled out some baby wipes. Handed her a couple.

'Here, let's clean some of that dirt off.'

She thanked me quietly, and began to wipe her arms and hands the best she could. I helped her with her face and the back of her neck and gave her one of my old bandanas to tie over her matted hair.

'Feel better?' I asked. She looked better, not clean by any means, but much less dirty. She nodded and surprised me by throwing her arms around me and holding on tight. I patted her back and shushed her when she started shaking again.

'It's alright, baby. You're gonna be just fine.' I gave her a squeeze and she let go, looking happy and relaxed.

She let me check her wounds, just little scratches and bug bites, some poison oak on her bare legs. I treated her the best I could with what I had. She loved the Hello Kitty bandaids that I had been carrying around. I never expected to be using the whole box on one child but I was happy to do it.

Chewie became excited again and I looked for what had her attention. I couldn't hear or see anything, not yet anyway. I told Sophia to slide down to the hood so she would be less visible.

'Lay flat, don't be scared.'

She did as I asked, her eyes going back and forth between me and Chewie. I knew something was coming, and it wasn't walkers, because Chewie didn't make a sound, just looked ahead, like she was waiting for a treat.

Then I could hear it. A motorcycle. I cursed and slid down the car. My instinct was to hide, immediately. I didn't understand why Chewie was just waiting.

'Chew!' I hissed. She looked over at me with her head cocked, wondering why I wasn't happy too.

What kind of ignorant fool rode around a motorcycle these days? I quickly double checked the SUV and put Sophia in the back, told her not to move until I said so. I smiled at her before closing the door, not wanting to frighten her.

'Sonora!' She called, sounding excited.

I opened the door quickly. 'What?'

'It could be Daryl!' She seemed pleased about this but I wasn't about to take chances.

'Stay quiet. If it's him I'll come right back for ya.'

'Sonora!'

I raised my eyebrows at her, waiting.

'He's real nice, he just don't seem like it.'

I nodded and closed the door. The engine on the bike slowed then came to a stop. Still a ways off, he would be on foot now. I hoped it was someone for Sophia, it had to be, for her sake. I stood next to Chewie, nervous, but well armed. Then I saw him, a few dozen yards off. Creeping around, trying to be stealthy. I ducked down but Chew barked in a friendly way, which surprised the hell out of me. She had never purposely drawn attention to us. She hated men most of all. Was capable of being downright vicious if they strayed too close. Walkers she avoided, men she took down.

'Sophia!' His voice rang out, loud and fearless. Just like the motorcycle. 'Sophia!'

I stood and he noticed me immediately. Still a few carlengths away, I held up a hand. He slowly made his way over and I called out,

'Don't come no closer. Dog don't like strangers.' I expected Chewie to be on high alert, teeth out and hair on end but she looked downright happy and could hardly contain it.

He was only a few yards away now, right in front of me. Crossbow in hand, although not raised towards me.

'Dog looks nice enough to me.' His tone was mocking, but he stayed where he was.

'She ain't.'

'Ain't looking for trouble.' He still didn't believe me. 'You alone?'

'Just us.'

'Touch those supplies on that car back there?' Accusing, and a bit rough.

'Got my own.'

'Seen a little girl?' His eyes scanned around, and came back to me.

'Who are ya?' I wouldn't keep her from him, just needed him to confirm his name.

'Ya seen her or not?' He nearly shouted.

'She's fine. Ain't just gonna hand her off to anyone.' My voice was calm, but the look on my face was poison.

'Daryl.' He offered, relieved and surprised that he had succeeded.

'Chew, stay.' And she knew I meant for her to watch him while I turned back to get Sophia. She stayed, but kept holding out a paw towards him as if begging for his attention. His eyes followed me, as I opened the door and helped Sophia step out. She gripped my hand and wouldn't let go as I brought her over.

He gave her a squinty smile but said nothing.

'Ya know this man?' I asked. She nodded but it was clear that they weren't exactly close.

'Where's my mom? And the others?' She whispered, surely hoping that he wasn't the only one left.

'Ain't far. Been looking for ya for days. Ya alright?'

She nodded again, still holding my hand. Chewie began to whine and couldn't sit still, looking up and begging me to let her go. I couldn't believe that fool dog. Had never once willingly gone towards a strange man but as soon as I nodded my head at her she ran to him like she'd been waiting for him all her life. He jumped back, afraid that perhaps she actually might attack. His instinct was to raise his bow, mine was to reach for my gun. He heard the hammer click and saw that I was aiming for his head.

'Don't hurt my dog. She's all I got left.' My voice came out shaky, but my aim was steady.

'The hell? Come on, Sophia. Let's go, your mama's waitin.' He ignored me and Chew, who had been inching closer to him, clearly meaning him no harm. He held out his hand to Sophia and Chewie licked it happily and then proceeded to sniff his boots and pants.'

'Yeah, real scary dog.' Mocking us again. Sophia hadn't moved, she was still holding tight to me and giggling a bit, watching that fool dog try to make a friend.

I turned Sophia towards me and gave her a hug. 'Alright? Need anything else?'

'No, but..ain't you coming along?' She looked at me, eyes clouding up with tears when she realized I was saying goodbye.

'No, baby. We'll be fine. Go on back to your mama.'

'But..but you can't. You're lost too. You said so. Please come along.' She was crying in earnest now, and held on to me again. I felt very awkward, holding that girl and trying to figure out how to hand her over to Daryl. He didn't know what to do either and we looked at each other, both hoping the other would come up with something.

'Course, ya can come along if ya want.' He went for the simplest solution, but I shook my head at him.

'That's kind, but we can't.' I tried to pry Sophia off of me and silently cursed myself for allowing this nonsense.

'Told me you was alone. Just come along. Don't belong out here by yourself.' He didn't look at me when he spoke. The comment annoyed me.

'We been alone a long time and we're just fine. Saved this baby today.'

He scowled at me. 'Come on, girl.' He called to Sophia, and turned towards his bike. Chewie was pleased, and made like she was going along with him.

'Chewie, heel.' I called out, and she was torn. She actually considered whether to obey or not. Completely out of character. I decided that she must be ill. 'Get over here.' I was very stern and reluctantly, she came and sat beside me, practically crying about it.

'Good Lord!' I exclaimed. 'Quit fussing.' It was directed at both of them. Sophia at least tried to stop.

'Please? My mama will want to see you.'

I was torn, but Daryl became impatient. 'Come on, ain't leaving any of ya here. 'Git yer stuff. Ain't hanging around here all day.' He turned back, 'C'mon, dog.'

And that traitor dog had the nerve to obey. I was dumbfounded, struggling to respond. 'Wait, I just have to get my pack.'

And they waited. Daryl and my dog. Sophia and I walked along behind.

'You came on a bike.' I slowed, seeing a way out.

'Ya figure that out all on your own?'

'How ya gonna get us all outta here?' I reasoned.

'Think I can manage gettin' two lil girls on a bike.' He replied, unconcerned.

'And my dog?'

'Loves me. Follow me anywhere.' He was trying to make me mad, and it was working.

'How far?' I demanded.

'Ain't far. Dog'll be fine.' He was sitting on the bike and was helping Sophia get on in front. I hung back, wanting to turn and run, now that he had her.

'C'mon, Sonora.' Sophia smiled brightly, waiting for me.

He looked over at me when she said my name. I realized then that I hadn't even told him what my name was and I was about to get on the back of his motorcycle. I shot Chewie a dirty look.

'Ain't gonna bite ya.' His eyes silently daring me to get on.

I adjusted my pack, before reluctantly taking my seat. Chew looked pleased.

'C'mon, you fool dog.'

The engine roared to life and I held tightly to him, although every fiber in my body protested.


	2. Chapter 2

He had told the truth. It wasn't far. Before I knew it, we were pulling up a long dirt driveway. The mailbox read 'Greene'. I was strangely nervous. It had been a while since I had been around people. Sophia was different, transparent. Adults were dangerous. More dangerous than walkers any day. I noticed a large farmhouse and a barn. There was an old RV parked beneath a tree. They had a lookout there, but with all the noise we made, a small crowd gathered before we had a chance to stop. One of the women shrieked and gasped before absolutely collapsing onto the ground.

There was a bit of chaos, for a few minutes. I hung back, crouched down on my heels, keeping Chewie close to me. We had a drink and I told her what a good girl she was. She seemed edgy and wouldn't even accept the bit of jerky I tried to give her. Her attention was directed at the barn, but the collection of men around us didn't help at all.

I gathered that the woman who fainted was Sophia's mother. She came around after a few minutes and held her daughter tightly, crying and rocking her. The excitement died down a bit and I heard Sophia call out to me,

'Sonora, come over here!'

All eyes fell on me and Chew. I felt completely awkward but stood up and made my way forward. Chewie stayed close, and I could hear her growling, very quietly.

'Mama, this is Sonora and this is Chewie. They found me.' She beamed at me and held out her hand. I crouched down in front of them.

The woman was shaking and and sobbing, blubbering out her thanks to me. She held onto Sophia with one arm and took my hand with the other. She squeezed tight and tried to form coherent words.

'Don't need no thanks.' I said quietly, just for her. 'Girl did real good. Saved herself, for sure. Dog helped her a bit is all.'

I switched to get away. To hide, more than anything. I knew I would have to talk to these people, and I hoped they wouldn't get in my way when the time came to leave.

A woman with long dark hair came close and laid a hand on Sophia's mother.

'Carol, let's get you inside. We can clean up Sophia.' She said gently. Carol nodded, still out of it. It was like looking at a woman who had spent days drinking moonshine. I had strange urge to laugh. The dark haired woman and another blonde helped Carol and Sophia to the house and I was left surrounded by men. I hadn't noticed, but Daryl was crouched down to my left, petting my dog and whispering in her ear. A faint smirk on his face. She was nervous, but not because of him. Her eyes went from the group of men, who outnumbered us, to the barn.

'I'm Rick,' One of the men came forward, a sheriff, clearly the leader. He held out his hand. 'Can't thank you enough for what you've done for us.'

'It was nothing,' I allowed. 'Dog's the one that found her.' The attention was too much. I could feel the flush creeping up my neck and I knew I was covered in ugly red blotches.

'Don't be nervous,' He reassured me. 'You're safe here.'

I nodded.

'Anyway, this is Shane, Dale, T-Dog, Glenn..you've met Daryl of course. Hershel's in the house, this is his farm. His daughters Maggie and Beth, probably with the rest of the girls. My son..' He trailed off. 'Please, make yourself at home. Anything you need, you got it.' His mind had wandered, and he turned towards the house. One of the men, who also appeared to be an officer, followed him without a word.

The other three, Dale, T-Dog and Glenn came over and said hello. Shook my hand, thanked me profusely. Pointed things out, offered to show me around. I declined, politely as I could, my mind not processing the chatter very well. They seemed nice enough, but I felt uneasy. Chewie whined at me and came to sit against my leg. The men began to focus their attention on her and she became upset, growling out a warning. Showing them her teeth. What she should have done back on the highway.

'It's alright, girl.' I laid a hand on her head, to steady her.

'She doesn't bite does she?' Glenn asked, taking a step back.

'Sure she does.' They normally wouldn't have been close enough to get bit. She would do it. If I gave her the ok.

'As long as she's not a danger.' Dale said, warily.

'She's fine.' I assured him. 'She's very well trained.'

They nodded, accepting my word for it.

Sophia's voice rang out, calling my name. I saw her waving from the porch. I smiled at the guys and turned towards Chewie, patting my leg for her to follow. She turned to Daryl and whined softly, but followed me up to the house. An older man came out, with two girls, one of them around my age, one a bit younger.

'I'm Hershel Greene.' He stated, rather bluntly. Wary of yet another person on his property. Sophia stood beside me, and took my hand. 'I understand you intend to stay here, I just need to be clear with you about my ground rules.'

'No, sir.' I explained. 'Ain't staying. Don't worry about us.'

Sophia looked shocked and betrayed. Hershel nodded, needing no other explanation. I got the impression that he wasn't exactly pleased about the current situation.

He turned away, then and the younger girl followed him back into the house.

'I'm Maggie Greene,' The other girl smiled. 'That was my daddy. Don't let him scare you off. You're more than welcome.'

'That's real nice and I do appreciate it.'

Sophia wasn't about to give up. She pulled me towards the door. 'C'mon, come meet Carl, come meet Lorie.'

I was in a trap.

I spent the afternoon doing my best to be friendly. All the women wanted to meet us. I met Lorie and Carl, Rick's wife and son and learned what had happened with their family. Rick had been separated from them, just recently reunited. Carl had been accidentally shot by one of Hershel's men on a search party for Sophia. Carl was fine, but the man had died getting medical supplies for him. Andrea had lost her sister. A woman named Jacqui, a man named Jim. Daryl had lost his brother. When Carol had calmed she showered us with thanks, fawned over the hero dog and begged me not to leave .

'Sophia just lost her daddy. We've lost so many so quickly. We'd love it if you stayed.'

I couldn't refuse them. Seemed silly to try. I was fine on the road with Chewie but I couldn't come up with a good reason to leave and trudge on.

'We'll stay for now. Rest up, figure things out.' This pleased them. Maggie gave Chewie a fine meal and Sophia sat with her while she ate. Lorie and Carol brought me clean clothes and suggested I use the shower. I was nervous to leave Chewie surrounded by strangers so Maggie helped me sneak her in the bathroom.

Finally alone, I took my first shower in months. The dirt and muck that came off of me was disgusting. I couldn't believe these people had let me near them. Embraced me even. I cringed at how I must have smelled. No wonder they threw me in the shower. It took several washes for my long hair to come clean. I considered asking one of the girls to cut it off for me.

I got out and dressed quickly, wishing I could throw Chewie in and rinse her off at least, but I decided that no one would likely appreciate that. I braided my wet hair back, realizing how ridiculously long it had gotten.

I could hear Hershel and his family eating in their kitchen and we slipped out of the house without making a sound. The group outside was gathered around a fire, eating supper as well. Sophia, of course, called me right over, she had a plate for me. I turned to tell Chew to lie down beside me, but she had strayed a few yards away, to say hello to Daryl. I caught his eyes and though he didn't smile I knew he was laughing at me.

I looked around for my pack so I could put my dirty things in it. 'Where's my gear?'

Rick explained that Glenn and T-Dog had set up a tent for us. Maggie had given me a bedroll and put my things inside for me. I thanked them sincerely, and tried to eat what they had given me. It was delicious, but more than I was used to consuming in a couple days. Not wanting to be sick, I slid some of my food onto Sophia's plate when she wasn't looking. Girl needed it more than I did. The group began to disperse, some to tents, some to the RV. I seized the opportunity for peace and quiet. I'd done more socializing in the last few hours than I was comfortable with.

We walked with Carol and Sophia to the RV, Chewie allowing Sophia to hug and kiss her, and Carol became emotional again, struggling for words.

We finally made it to our tent. Chewie began to nose around, first in the direction of the barn, but was quickly distracted by Daryl coming up from behind. She began to circle him, jumping and pawing at his legs, whining when he didn't stop.

'Down, girl,' I called, and she sat, looking back and forth between Daryl and I. He crouched down, scowling at me and took Chewie's face in one hand. She licked his face, he pawed at her playfully, and then he stood up.

'Real nice dog,' He called over his shoulder, and he disappeared from view. Chew would not come into the tent for several minutes, until she was satisfied that he wasn't coming back.


End file.
